I mowed the lawn today. I know, riveting stuff. I haven't mowed the lawn in forever. It has rained so much the past 3 months that my yard has been a swamp. Then we had the tropical storm last week that helped complete the ensemble with random tree limbs strewn everywhere.
The yard has finally sobered up and today I mowed it. I have been in charge of the yard since I quit my job last summer. We always paid a yard guy because my husband HATES mowing the lawn and he would put it off all the time. I tried to mow it but I could never get the damn lawn mower to crank and it was so heavy to push. I am the size of a 5th grade child. It was not compatible. We could not justify the $160 a month yard bill with me quitting so I looked for a solution.
I brought a tiny, light weight lawn mower. It has an extension cord but I'd never mowed the lawn before so I didn't know the difference. The first time I mowed the lawn, I was so excited. How is it that is 32 years old life, I had never known the satisfaction of making beautiful lines in my grass? Plus, it burns 500 calories. I freaking LOVE mowing the lawn. I look forward to it.
My husband hates the fact that I mow our lawn. "I feel bad. I should be mowing the lawn. The neighbors probably think I'm a piece of crap because you mow the lawn."
I laughed, "Who cares what the neighbors think? The neighbors also have seen me curse the kids out at 6:30 in the morning in my pajamas, get the mail in my slippers, and sometimes we leave the trashcan on the side of the house. What are we supposed to put on airs for these people?"
I actually have really cool neighbors who are totally not judging me and my 2 neighbors across the street have a 4 kids each. They don't give a sh*t about us, they are just trying to make it through the day.
I joked, "Next time I'm mowing the lawn you should come out and yell, "When you're done with that, come in here and make me a sandwich." He laughed.
I can mow the lawn if I want to.
I don't mean that in a penis-hating, vagina-hat-wearing, free- bleeding feminist kind of way but in a Yay-girl-power-I-have-choices feminist kind of way.
Let's face it, I'm not really independent. I'm dependent on my husbands income, love and emotional support, and his ability to lay the smack down on our children when I feel like I want to drive far away and enter the witness protection program so no one will find me. You know, stuff like that.
I took me 4 and a half hours to mow the jungle that was my front and back yard and drag pieces of the neighbors tree to the curb. I edged and watered my flowers. I felt so accomplished. Any day I mow the lawn in a good day.
The kids are okay. School is busy for them both and their activities are in full swing but it's almost October which means Halloween is coming! I asked them what they wanted to be for Halloween. My youngest was like, "I want to be this obscure character from this obscure anime from 1998." I looked to see what was available. Nothing. "Anything else you might want to be?" She replied, ""I want to be this obscure character from this obscure anime from 2007." I could not even.
My damn kids do this to me every year. They can't be anything normal like a f*cking witch or a scarecrow. They request some crazy costume that I usually wind up sewing. I am not doing it this year. "I'm not spending $150 on a cosplay costume for you for Halloween." This child actually looked and me and asked, "Why not?"
"You have a $50 limit, that's it." I think $50 is MORE than generous. They are lucky I don't buy them sheets from Goodwill to put over their heads.
She did find a costume. She is going to be Yuno.
Do you know who Yuno is? Neither do I. But I do know she is about $50 so that works for me.
My oldest wanted to be a clown, but everyone is going to be a clown. I was browsing dresses the other day and I sent her text. I know you want to be a clown but you do SUCH good hair and make-up. You should totally be a flapper. She agreed.
I'm not talking about a trashy flapper with all the fringe. I'm talking a Great Gabsy classy girl.
Long strand of pearls, long satin gloves and gold slippers....how cute and pretty is that?
So I the lawn is mowed and the Halloween costumes are picked. I've checked 2 things off my ever growing list.
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