Towels

                            
Most of the time, I fool myself into thinking that I'm holding down this whole being a parent-adult thing. Sometimes I have moments of clarity when I realize that I actually have lost control of my life. I had one such epiphany this weekend while I was folding laundry.

I had 20 loads to do. I was sitting on my bedroom floor folding bath towels. I looked at my towels and realized that something was terribly wrong.

Look at this sh*t:

What the hell? How is this being used? A burlap cloth would be more absorbent.

Purple nail polish. Thanks kids!

All of my towels are frayed, or have a hole or have nail polish or some other curious stain on them. How did I let this happen? How did we come to this sorry state? When did I even buy them? Like 10 years ago? 

I picked them all up and headed downstairs. My husband was curious. "What are you doing with all the towels?"

"I'm throwing them out. I'm not going to live like this anymore."

I threw out the bath towels, got in the car and drove directly to the store. I did not pass GO or collect $200. I walked into Target and went to the towel section and cleared out the white towel rack. I went for the mid-range towels. They were selling some towels for $18 bucks each. 

Who are the millionaires hanging around Target buying $18 towels? That's beyond my thresh hold. I thought $12 was too much but I didn't care. I am taking my life back and having legit towels in my house.

I was so excited when I got home. I put them through the wash and folded them carefully. That night I made sure I got in the shower before everyone else. You know I don't get hot showers, usually. I took a long, hot shower and stepped out and dried off with one of my new towels. It was so soft and absorbent. What have I been missing? This is what luxury feels like.

I'm not going to lie - it was one of the highlights of my weekend. It doesn't take much to get me excited when my standards are so low. Hot shower + absorbent towel = best thing ever.

That night when I went to bed, I had another moment of clarity. My damn pillows are so flat. I've stuffed like 3 of them into one pillowcase. I've gotten the kids new pillows but I am using the same damn pillows I purchased when I moved south 9 years ago. 

Apparently, you are supposed to replace your pillows every 2 years. I never got the memo about this. Is this something that other people know about? They should have a f**king class for grown ups that tells you crap like that.

Also, I realized this week that I don't own a cake server. How is that possible? I bake. Often. I suck at being an adult and my life is out of control. Meh.