The Saga Continues

Where did I leave off in the early January saga? You'll remember I had a crazy time getting my car fixed, then drove to Tennessee the following day, then drove HOME from Tennessee the day after that (after eating some sweat-infused Wendys), then slept for 5 hours before getting up to drive daughter number 1 to a band audition.

I made us both breakfast that morning, a BIG cup of coffee in my travel mug and we loaded into the car for the almost 2 hour drive. My eyes were sore and my butt was numb but I was powering through. My 12 year old was chatting away. Filling me in on the last 2 days of school and about the tattoo she's planning on getting. "I've decided, that when I'm 18, I'm going to get a tattoo on my rib cage of a bar of music that I like. I haven't decided which song yet, maybe Moonlight Sonata."

                          
I let her pick the music for the car ride. This is what she chose: selections from The Last of the Mohicans soundtrack, Mozart's Requiem, Moonlight Sonata, Any Other Name.... which, in a normal situation would be okay but I was so TIRED.

I cut her off. "You need to play some upbeat music - Metallica, Atari Teenage Riot, ANYTHING....I'm literally going to fall asleep and crash into a tree." I told my daughter to turn off Beethoven and put on Metallica. Bad Mom Award. There is a special place in hell for people like me.

We get there and she warms up. She told me her audition was at 11. The time was quickly approaching and when I reminded her she said, "No. It's at 11:48." We could have left FIFTY minutes later. I could have gotten FIFTY more minutes of sleep. Those were fighting words.

I stood around and waited. I was not going to sit down on my tuckus. After the audition, she wanted to go to Taco Bell before we made the long ride home. We walked into the Taco Bell and there was a young man a suit. "Hey, it's you!" he said with a smile when my daughter walked in. He was older, maybe 17. I was not having that.
               
"Who is that?!?!" I whispered to her.
"Nobody. We were just talking before my audition."
"Talking about what?"
"Band stuff, mom - and cruise ships."
"You're not allowed to talk to strangers."
"OMG, mom!"

My daughter is only 12 but she looks much older, which I HATE. I'm going to start making her wear a tee-shirt that has her age on it. Ugggggggggghhhhhhhhhh!

After we ate our disgusting Tacos, we drove back home. I was getting my second wind. I went upstairs and laid down on my stomach in bed. I was weepy. "Dude! I think I have bed sores on my rear end from driving. I'm serious." My husband rolled his eyes at me. "You're going to be fine."
"No, I'm not. I need Bengay on my cheeks, like, right now."
"I'm not doing that. That's where I'm drawing the line."
"I'm never going to drive again!!!!'

I laid there for a little while but not long enough to take a nap. I had a penis cake to make.

That night, we had a birthday party to go to. It was my birthday party, actually. I share a birthday with one of my good friends and we decided to have a joint birthday party. As I joke, I told her I was going to make her a big penis cake.

This cake was a lot of work. I made the cake and fondant ahead of time. I cut it in half and did a vanilla butter cream filling. I shaped it, I rolled on the fondant. I made hair out of chocolate sprinkles, I made a blue fondant ring for it, I made splooge out of melted butter and powdered sugar. It was a whole production AND I had to make sure my kids weren't in the kitchen. It took a while but I was happy with the finished product.  I put the cake in the fridge, dropped my kids off at their friend's house, then came home to get ready for the party.

When it was time to leave, I took out the cake and brought it into the car. My husband was sooooo offended. "You need to cover that thing. That is so embarrassing. That is the equivalent of the leg lamp."
He DID NOT like the cake, he ranted and raved. "I'm not eating that cake, people are going to judge you...."

Judge me? Like I have standards? Who cares? I thought it was funny. Penises are bizarre appendages. It was silly. Everyone liked the cake. As a matter of fact, they suggested I sell them. How? Post on MomSwap? That would go over well.

We laughed and laughed. We took pictures, which I'm sure will be used to blackmail me one day. We had a blast that night. There were cocktails, strobe lights, dancing, lots of laughing..... Even my husband loosened up. It was 2 in the morning and they were getting ready to kick us out of their house and he was still dancing in the living room like:

                                  
"This party's just begun!" I had to corral him back to the car. It was so nice to have a fun night out without the kids. That never happens.

We slept in super late the next day and picked the kids up in the afternoon. Then we just laid around and recovered. The kids had off for MLK day the next day, so it was perfect. I got up the following morning and drove my daughter to the school, as she was in a parade, went home to get dressed, went out to lunch with my hubby and the youngest, watched the parade, took my youngest to her dentist appointment, made a quick trip to the grocery store, went home and cooked dinner and got ready for the week ahead.

I was so excited for the following day. I was going to nap and catch up on life. Or so I thought....

Tennessee Time

                                              
After the car debacle, it was time to drive to Tennessee for my daughter's gymnastic competition. I picked her up from school on Thursday morning, took her out to lunch and we headed out. It was nice for just the 2 of us to spend one-on-one time together.

This school year has not been an easy one. This is the year of the great divide for her - the year that she pulled away. Just think, last year she was still begging me to sleep in my bed. Now, I have to BEG her to just say good night to me. My mere existence has become an embarrassment to her.

I do not hold it against her. I understand that it is necessary and eventually things will even out but it's not easy. I do my best to connect with her anyway that I can. We took turns playing music and she took a nap. After 5 and a half hours, we made it to the hotel. The parking lot of the hotel was adjacent to an Outback Steakhouse. My daughter was sooooo excited, "Can we get steaks?"

We checked in and then headed over for dinner. She is so funny when she orders food. She's like a 40 year old woman. "I would like my steak medium rare, with a side of steamed broccoli and the potato soup." She didn't ask for a lobster tail. This surprised me, she usually does ask for a lobster tail or add on shrimp. There was the time she tried to order a $40 slice of meatloaf at the Stanley Hotel.... She thinks we're rich for some reason.
             
I always have to shut her down.

We enjoyed our dinner and she lamented to me about how horrible middle school is and how she wants school to be over so she can watch anime all day.

We went back to the hotel room and watched TV and I was out by 9. I was so tired and had a long day ahead of me. We slept in the next day and then got ready for her competition. I had a very specific timeline.

Friday:
11: 00 - check out
11:30 - lunch
11:45 - check in for competition
3:30- competition over
4:45- awards over
5-11 - Drive home

I planned to take my oldest to a band audition 2 hours from home on Saturday morning, leaving at 8 am. That was the plan.

We ate lunch and checked in and the competition was already running late already. She did her best, she still isn't competing bars. Awards were running late. They had a former male Olympian doing the awards and he is going on and on about "believing in your dreams..." I was standing there like
                            
Come on, let's get this show on the road, we have places to be......

She placed in floor and beam, so she was happy about that. We walked out of there at almost 6:15 pm. It was a LONG ride home. We drove out of Knoxville and stopped at a random Wendys in the middle of no where to have dinner. It was the only place around.

I put a change of comfy clothes in her competition bag and when we went inside she went into the bathroom to change out of her leotard and I ordered our food. There was a lady in front of us with 5 kids arguing about chicken nuggets or something. There was one morbidly obese man working behind the counter, at least 400 pounds and he was doing EVERYTHING. He was running in the back to grab fries, he's trying to fill up drinks...he was really struggling.

I stood in line for 15 minutes before he even got to me. By this time, he is sweating profusely. He is wiping his brow with the apron. I ordered our food and watch him run around to get the fries and fill our drinks. All I could think about was him sweating on our food and our cups. His sweaty hands handling our food. *VOMIT* I brought the tray to the table and my daughter and I sat down to eat. I was so grossed out but I decided that I was just going to have to lower my standards.

Let's be honest - I just had to have no standards. I ate that sweaty, Wendys shit and I regretted it with every single bite. It was getting late and I was in a rush to leave. "Bring your fries with you, let's go!"

We finished the drive home. It was LONG and miserable. My ass hurt so much from sitting all day and driving forever. I walked through the door at 12:45 am. My husband woke up when he heard us come in.

"I can take our oldest to her band audition tomorrow," he said.
"NO - you promised the youngest that you would take her to lunch and roller skating."
"Yeah, but you won't be able to function tomorrow."
"I'll be fine. She's been looking forward to spending time with you tomorrow and it would break her heart. I can power through."

He looked at me suspiciously.

"Seriously, set the alarm for 7 am. I'll get in 6 good hours."

I fell asleep right away. It seemed like only a few minutes when my husband woke me up in a panic. "It's 7 o'clock! Wake up! You need to get up!"

I opened my eyes and saw the clock said 7:00. I groaned. "Just give me 5 more minutes." I dozed off for a few minutes. I opened my eyes again and it still was 7:00 on the dot. Am I living in the Twilight Zone? Do I have no sense of time?

Then I realized that my husband set the alarm but never flipped the clock back. When I did, I discovered that it was actually 6:10 am. I was a raving lunatic, I was so angry.
                               
My husband was not phased. "Just go back to sleep." I tried but I was awoken in such a panic that I couldn't fall back asleep.

I got out of bed and went into the bathroom to take a shower. I looked in the mirror. My hair was tousled, my eyes were dry and red, my butt was sore. It was the beginning of yet another very long day.....

Car Troubles Part 2

                                               
The Monday following my accident and subsequent car trouble, I called the car dealership to schedule a time to be seen. The lady on the phone told me that they could not get me in until next week. I told her that wasn't going to work, that I had to go out of town that week, and that the vehicle was not functional. She told me she could get me in on Wednesday morning. I took the appointment.

Wednesday was a little crazy. I dropped the kids off at school in my car and when I got home around 8, my dad was at the house. He was going to follow me to the dealership which is just a mile away from the house. I drove the Jeep and he was behind me in my car. The damn car stalled out before we even got out of the neighborhood. My dad showed up at the drivers side window.

"Get out of the car. I'm driving it. You have babies to take car of. I'm driving this car...." He was acting like he was going to risk his life or something.

"Okay dad, but you have to be really careful. The car just shuts off when you are in the middle of driving it. If it does that, you need to turn the ignition really hard and press on the gas and it will start. Drive slowly with the emergencies on and let me follow behind you," I told him, handing off the keys.

He gets into the Jeep and I get into my vehicle to follow him. What does he do? Tries to ditch me, turns onto the main road and is weaving in and out of traffic, cutting people off....in my husband's car that just STOPS WORKING while driving with no warning.

I am trying to catch up with him and I am having a full on freak out. I couldn't breathe.
                
We pull into the dealership and I'm like, "What the f*ck, dad?" He just shrugged, "I'm not afraid to die." I was annoyed but he was doing me a favor so I couldn't really complain.

We get in and this guy Larry offers to help us. Larry looks like he spent to many days out in the sun. The kind of guy who smoked Pal Mals and had himself a lot of hoes in the 80s. I told him my name and he looked me up in the computer.
"I don't have you in here for an appointment today."
"Well, I called Monday and told them it was an emergency and they told me to come in this morning."
"That's impossible, we're booked a week and a half out," Larry replied.

While this interaction was occurring, my father was pacing, breathing hard and clenching his fists. He couldn't help himself. He butted in loudly, "You need a car! You have kids and you need to go to Tennesse! This is bullshit! They better not charge you either- that car is under warranty, right?" Then he gave Larry a dirty look.

I glanced at him like,
                       
                  I'm going to need you to stop acting like you're from New Jersey right now.

"Dad, you need to go sit in the lobby. I'm a big girl. I'm an adult woman now. I can handle this situation." He was not happy but went into the lobby. I turned back to Larry.

"I'm sorry about that. Listen, my husband is out of town. I need to go to Tennessee tomorrow morning. My car is not functioning and is a death trap. The lady on the phone told me to come in this morning. I need you to help me."

Larry was very reasonable. He pulled up some information in the computer, "Did you know a part of your transmission is under recall? I think that might be your problem."
"No. You would think they would send us information about that...."
"I can get you an estimate for the light, and we can fix the transmission problem, but we'd have to re-schedule you for an oil change."
"Perfect."

I retrieved my father from the lobby and we went back to my house. He drove home and I went directly to go get the oil changed in my car since I had decided to drive it to Tennessee. I'm waiting in the lobby and get a phone call from my husband.

"Hey! The planes can't take off from Colorado Springs because of wind. I already missed my connecting fight. I'm going to drive up to Denver to see if I can catch a flight home today."
"No, you NEED to be home today. I need to leave for Tennessee in the morning and our oldest can't miss school."
"I'm trying. I might be home late tonight...."
"Just keep me updated."

The day was quickly turning into a shit show. It was a 2 hour excursion to get the oil changed. I ran home and did a load of laundry and made a batch of fondant for my penis cake (will explain later) and then picked up my dad to go back to the dealership to pick up my Jeep, dropped the Jeep off to get the oil changed, and then took my dad out to lunch as a thank-you.

It was nice. We don't get to hang out as much as I like and we laughed and had a nice time. I got a text from my husband that he found a flight out of Denver and would be home shortly after 8 pm. Was so happy.

Then began what I call the Wednesday evening shuffle. I dropped dad off at his house, went to pick up my youngest from school, dropped her off at gymnastics, drove ALL the way back to the school to pick up my daughter and her friend from jazz band, dropped off the friend, picked up my brother from work for dinner, picked up the Jeep from the oil change place, went back to my house where I served him and my daughter dinner (I did BBQ pulled pork in the crock pot at 6:30 am), packed food for my youngest, dropped my brother back off at work, dropped off my oldest at dance, picked up my youngest from gymnastics, drove ALL the way back to pick up my oldest from dance, and then headed to the airport to pick up my husband.

It was almost 8:30 when we got home. I was exhausted. It was one of those days. I laid in bed and thought about the next day. I need to drop off a box at the school, come home and pack for Tennessee, bake a cake for Saturday since I won't be home, prep dinner for husband and make lunches for Friday, place grocery order, pick up youngest from school around 11, drive 5 and a half hours to Tennessee.....

I'm just over here, leaving the dream every day....

Car Troubles Part 1

I all began 2 Fridays ago. The kids had just returned to school from winter break, my husband had just left for a trip and we were getting into the routine of things. That Friday, I decided I was going to go to the gym before picking up my daughter from gymnastics. I left an hour earlier than usual.

Traffic on the interstate was stupid. I was in stop-and-go traffic in the far right hand lane. The car in front of me slowed down, so I slowed down. I looked in my mirror and saw a pair of headlights coming at me full speed ahead.

There was no where for me to go and not enough time to get out of the way even if I wanted to. I knew that this car was going to hit me. In that moment of acceptance, I had a peace come over me. My first thought was to relax. I read somewhere that drunk drivers usually survive bad wrecks because they are relaxed. In the seconds that the car was coming at me, I relaxed and went completely limp. He hit me HARD. I flailed forward. Then, it was quiet. I turned my head back and forth. I looked around. I wasn't in a ditch. I was okay.

I was scared to get out of the car and see the back. I was sure it would be all f*cked up. Surprisingly, it was only scratched up and the back light was torn out. It FELT worse than it actually was. The guy was very apologetic about it.

I called my dad and asked him to pick up my daughter. "I was heading to the Chinese Buffet. I'll just take her with me." That was taken care of. We called the cops and waited. Weirdly, the guy is a few years older than me, his wife stays home and his kids are also in 5th and 7th grade and so we chatted about middle school hell. The cop came, wrote up his report and it was done. I was feeling so happy to be alive.

I wound up picking up my oldest and meeting my dad and youngest at the Chinese Buffet. My brother showed up as well as a family friend. It actually turned out to be a nice evening. I think GOD was trying to tell me that I don't need to be going to the gym.

The next day, I woke up and felt fine. My right shin was sore but I felt surprisingly good. I expected to have whiplash the way I was thrown around. That day it was frigid and we stayed inside and were lazy. That night was the night that we watched "Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter is Dead."

After the movie, I had some friends over. I built a fire and we just hung out and chatted about boring grown-up shit like insurance and carpets. My oldest came downstairs around 10 and asked to sleep over a friend's house.

The friend lives right around the corner, so I told my friends to stay and that I'd be right back. It was FREEZING but because it was so close, I didn't even put my jacket on. I grabbed my purse and went out the door to drop her off in my pajamas and slippers. When I started the car, it jerked a little bit and sounded funny. I assumed it was because of the big drop in the temperature. I drove there fine, dropped her off and headed right back.

I slowed down at a stop sign on my way home and the Jeep just shut off. The battery light flashed for a minute and the display on the dashboard said, "Put the Vehicle in Park." Then it just shut off in the middle of the road.

I put the car in Park and then tried to start it. It wouldn't turn over. I tried again. Still wouldn't turn over. Tried again and it still would not turn over. Not a problem, I'll just call my friend who is sitting at my house. I reach into my purse. No phone. I left my phone at home like an idiot.

                             
I sat in the dark, in the Jeep in the middle of the road, shivering and pondering what to do next. Finally, I thought You are going to start, mother f**ker. I turned the ignition HARD and pressed on the gas and to my surprise, the car sputtered to life. Success!

It jerked but it worked. As I approached the next stop sign, I slowed down and the car hesitated like it was going to stall out again. I just couldn't slow down. I drove through 3 stop signs on my way home and just hoped there were no cops around. I pulled into my drive way and breathed a sigh of relief. I'd made it.

This was just too much car excitement for me. I'll just drive the Kia and I'll call the Jeep dealership on Monday. I'm sure it will be painless....

I called the dealership first thing on Monday and had them schedule my service for Wednesday morning. That is the day that I became an Uber driver.....

Things Were Questionable

We had a nice, relaxing weekend. It was super cold so we stayed inside and lounged around. My daughter came to me at some point in the afternoon to tell me there were snow flurries coming down. I asked if she wanted to go outside to experience the flurries. "No," she said, "I don't want to put pants on." She's definitely my child.

That night, I made a spaghetti dinner and we debated what we wanted to do that evening. It's just me and the girls for a few more days. My husband is buried in snow out West. We decided on a movie night. After I did the dishes, I built a fire and we roasted marsh mellows and tried to agree on a movie. Which is difficult for 3 people. As I browsed the selections, I came across the movie Milk Money. I thought to myself, Wow! That's a weird movie. 

The plot of this movie is that there are a group of 11-12 year old boys and they want to see a real life naked woman so they save up their lunch money and go in their piggy banks, go to the city, pick up a hooker, they pay for her to expose her breasts- which she does to CHILDREN, then for some reason they take her home.... I don't remember the whole thing. I watched it when I was 11.

This movie was released in 1994 and was rated PG-13. It was advertised to kids. This is the trailer. You will cringe on the inside when you watch it. You will think, Who thought this was a good idea? What the actual hell?

The reason I'm bringing this up is because when you are raising kids you have a tendency to refer back to when you were a kid. I do that from time to time, and the results are questionable. Take metal slides, for instance:

Hey kids! It's the middle of summer- let's go to the playground and get second degree burns on our legs.

Parental guidelines didn't go into effect until 1997. That is only 7 years before MY oldest child was born. That seems insane to me. Our parents must have been like, Let's watch this show and hope there is no excessive sex and violence....

No one cared about child obesity. They were like, Drink this Slimer Hi-C and shut the hell up.

Gross. What even is this?

Joe Camel was advertising cigarettes to kids:

In middle school, I actually slow danced with a boy to "I'll Make Love to You."

What the actual f*ck were these people thinking? I can see the school administrators and PTA in their meeting: I have a great idea. We can have a school dance and all the 6th and 7th grade boys and girls can get REALLY close together while we play a song about making love all through the night. 

I am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination and I am very laid back but even I have standards. I know you're shocked- you should be. When I hear about how "bad" things are today and how people have no morals and the "kids" today are just terrible, I think - Do you have amnesia? 

We've been on a downward spiral for DECADES. My movie night browsing was just a reminder of that.

We finally decided on, Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter is Dead. Great movie! The kids liked it a lot, but it also had some questionable things. My oldest daughter said, "Why is the 17 year old smoking in front of her mom and why does the 15 year old have a tattoo?"

"Because people did questionable things back then."

My youngest interjected, "And those clothes! Did people really wear clothes like that?"

"Yes. It was a crazy time."

So from now on, whenever I question my parenting I will remind myself that I pay attention to TV Parental guidelines that actually exist, and I try to feed my kids healthy foods, and my daughters aren't grinding at school dances to questionable songs or watching movies about hookers that take their clothes off for children, or sliding down sliding boards that might burn off the first layer of the skin on their legs.....

I'm kind of winning.

                                  

Winter Break is Over

                  
I really enjoyed the kid's winter break. Most parents were happy to see their kids go back to school - not me. It was glorious. No waking up at 6 am, no making lunches, no battling afternoon traffic from the middle school, no reminding the kids to do homework, go to bed, brush their teeth..... Didn't care.

As the break came to an end, I was not feeling happy about it. "I'm thinking about homeschooling the kids," I told my husband. He looked at me like I was insane. I clarified, "I don't actually want to teach them anything, I just don't want to wake up at 6 am anymore."

The day before the kids went back, my husband had to leave for another work trip. The night before, he finished packing his bag and we had a chat about his flight. "I'm going to need to be at the airport at 5:30," he said.
"What?!?!?! In the morning?"
"Yes. I had to book that flight because....something about Chicago.......I don't remember -I wasn't paying attention.
"Can't you take an Uber?" I asked.
"No. It'll be fine. I'm going to get up at 4 and get ready."
He was sounding like this was okay. I was very confused. "Well, we will need to leave at 5:15 so wake me up at 5:00."
We agreed to it and we went to bed.

The next morning, I was sleeping soundly when my husband nudged me. I opened my eyes slowly and he was standing over me, grinning. "Hey honey, wake up. I made you breakfast." I turned and looked at the clock. It's bright red numbers glowed 4:45."
                                               
                                                  
"I thought we agreed on 5:00," I whined.
"But I made you breakfast," he replied.
"I need a few more minutes."

He went downstairs and I rolled over to fall back asleep. Then, my phone rang. I opened my eyes. It was 5:52. It was my husband. I picked up my phone.
"Why are you calling me?" I asked, annoyed.
"Because I made you breakfast."
"I thought I was going to get to sleep until 5:00."
"NO. You said that you needed a few minutes, and I gave you a few minutes."

I hung up on him. I groaned and rolled out of bed. I stomped downstairs and sat down at the kitchen table. He was smiling. He won. He was chatting away as I spooned oatmeal into my face hole, still half asleep.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Dude! I'm tired. Why did you wake me up so early?"
"It was only 15 minutes earlier."

That's what he thinks. There is like, 3 hours between 4:45 and 5 am. It's some weird space time continuum.
"But I'm so tired."
"I made you breakfast because I love you," he said.
"If you REALLY love someone, you don't wake them up at 4:45 in the morning."
He laughed and laughed and I just stared at him blankly while I sipped my coffee.

I dropped him off at the airport and I was sad to see him go, even if he does hate to see me sleep. It's only an 8 day trip this time around which makes me happy.

I came back home and tried to get everything in order for the kids to go back to school the next day. The chidren were mopey about it. That night at dinner I asked the kids, "What time do you guys go to bed?" I forgot. I thought maybe 9, 9:30, 10? I wasn't sure. Isn't that terrible? I'm the worst mom ever.

The adjustment has not been easy. The kids are like, Oh shit! We have to do stuff? 

Today, after I dropped off my youngest at gymnastics, I went home to my 12 year old and told her that we were going out to pizza. I had some free vouchers but I wanted to run by the convenience store and pick up a 2 liter of soda. Which was weird, it was out of the routine.

On the way there, we had a conversation.
"I see you have an atom project for science. What is that about?"
"I don't know."
"Well, I saw it added in Powerschool."
"We don't have to do it. It's extra credit."
"That doesn't seem right. Did your teacher give you a paper about it?"
"No. She just told us about it. We have to build an atom or something."
"Well, you're doing it."
"I can't because it's a group project and no one else wants to do it."

We were getting out of the car when the conversation turned into more of an argument.

"What do you mean? I'm sure Cheergirl will do it with you."
My daughter shook her head, "No she won't."
"She will if I call her mother and tell her about it."

As soon as I looked up, there was Cheergirls mother. She was sitting in her car, right in front of me. What is the likelihood of that? She rolled down her window and we had a little chat. "Did you know there is this extra credit project for science? My daughter was under the impression that your daughter is not going to do it but I told her that you would make her."
She smiled at me and my daughter, "Girl, yes she is! You text me the details." I LOVE her.

She pulled away and we waved to each other. My daughter threw her hands up. "God must have arranged that!"
"That's right! Because he wants you to get extra credit!"

Now, I am off to email this science teacher about this project because all my daughter knows is that she needs to build "an atom or something." Only 95 days until Spring Break....

Happy New Year!

                       
It's officially here- 2017. Everyone seemed to think 2016 was the worst year EVER for some reason, but I beg to differ.

I would say maybe 1346-1353 when the black plague killed an estimated 100+ MILLION people. Those were bad years. Or possibly 1861, when the civil war started. Or maybe 1918 when World War I was going on and millions of people died on pandemic flu. You know, 1942 was pretty terrible while the Holocaust was going on and American soldiers were fighting in World War II. In modern history, I would say 2001 was pretty terrible which saw the deadliest terrorist attack on US soil and ushered in a fundamental change of our way of life....

I get that a lot of celebrities died, there was a hurricane, there was zika, shootings, and people were unhappy with the outcome of the election but to call 2016 the WORST YEAR EVER is a little heavy-handed, in my opinion.

For me, 2016 was okay. It wasn't without it's trials and tribulations but all-and-all, I feel pretty blessed. The highlight for me was our vacation out West. We had a great time and really bonded as a family. I quit my job, my husband took on a new role that required him to travel, the children grew tremendously. My youngest daughter started middle school, my oldest joined marching band. They gave me quite a bit of trouble, but not any more or less than I expected. I have a lot to be thankful for. This year was one of changes and transitions. I am looking forward to my next adventure, whatever that may be.

I never really make resolutions because I know that I won't follow through, but I do have some goals and aspirations for this year.

This:

So funny - ALMOST done. It's been a labor of love and I need to just wrap it up, close my eyes and jump off the ledge.

I am looking forward to:

                         

We leave EXACTLY 5 months from today. I am SUPER DUPER EXCITED!!!!

As the years go on, I have gotten more in touch with myself and figuring out the things that make me happy and those things that drain me. I definitely want to focus more on the things that bring me joy and eliminate the things that don't. On the same note, I have definitely gotten a lot better at realizing that I have GOT to take care of myself. That means, no more burning the candle at both ends. Sometimes that means I take a nap even when I have a million things to do. Sometimes that means saying "NO". Sometimes that means sitting down and watching a show alone. This year I want to continue to focus on being gentle with myself- because ultimately, I am a better wife-mother-person when I am.

                                    

I want to continue to build better relationships with my husband and my children. I want to laugh more and stress less....

So here is to 2017 - may our expectations be low, our hopes be high and may we be grateful for having whatever year we may have. Here is to counting our blessings but never our glasses of wine and to appreciating the fact that we've made another orbit around the sun.